Flyday 17th Octopus

Mr. Paul Foot, Life President of the Guild of Paul Foot Connoisseurs and his worker, A, K-Sletcher, travelled by diesel train to Glasgow to perform the Hovercraft Symphony.

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Thirsty 16th Octopus

Mr. Paul Foot, Life President of the Guild of Paul Foot Connoisseurs, took the train up the beautiful Scottish east coast to Aberdeen. He could see all the beautiful waters of the North Sea and the lovely fields and whatnot. … Continue reading

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Wrensday 15th Octopus

Mr. Paul Foot, Life President of the Guild of Paul Foot Connoisseurs, took the train to Edinburgh and went to the ‘otel and recorded a podcaste with Malcolm Head and performed the Hovercraft Symphony.

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Tunesday 14th Octopus

Mr. Paul Foot, Life President of the Guild of Paul Foot Connoisseurs, and his worker met at Kings Cross Railway station and took the East Coast diesel train to Durham City. The show was cancelled due to the council workers … Continue reading

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Going Viral – 14th Octopus 2014

In other news, routine screening starts today at ports and airports for passengers entering the UK who may be suffering from UKIP. The government have brought in these emergency measures, fearing an epidemic of UKIP, following recent high-profile infections, such … Continue reading

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3 Humane Ways to Combat the Spider Invasion – 29th Septet 2014

As ye may have noticed, there has been an awful lot of news coverage recently about the “spider invasion” that we are apparently experiencing in the U.K. I don’t know because I’m in Australala currently, and despite having an arachnid … Continue reading

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Centre Parkz Hell – 29th Apricot 2014

Popular holiday hell hole, Center Parcs, has been scolded by The Advertising Standards Selectee, ASS, following a television commercial that instructs parents to take their kids out of school during term time and enjoy a family holiday in Center Parcs. … Continue reading

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Would I Glide To You – 11th Apricot 2014

For over a month now, the hunt has been on for the missing headline: “Flight MH370 Found.” The headline, which was expected to be found shortly after MH370 went missing, has vanished without trace – the longest time that such … Continue reading

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Moonday 13th Octopus

Mr. Paul Foot, Life President of the Guild of Paul Foot Connoisseurs, travelled homo on the diesel train from Exeter and unpacked and washed clothes and then packed again for the next bit of tour.

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Sundae 12th Octopus

Mr. Paul Foot, Life President of the Guild of Paul Foot Connoisseurs, and his worker, A. K-Sletcher, ate a top quality breakfast in the Swan ‘otel and then walked through a little park where there were strange tropical birds to … Continue reading

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